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An introduction to South Africa: straightforward advice and honest information for visitors, tourists, travellers and the just plain curious.
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Archive for June, 2009

15 things you can buy at the side of the road in South Africa

June 30, 2009 By: Phillip Category: Lists, Retail

To further the cutting-edge research first published in “21 things you can buy at South African traffic intersections”, we present: 15 things you can buy at the side of the road. For these you’ll actually have to get out of your car, or at the very least pull over to the side of the road.

(List correct at time of publication. No credit cards or travellers cheques accepted. Transportation is the sole responsibility of the purchaser unless otherwise negotiated and remunerated. Inclusive of value added tax (VAT), but no tax refunds available. All verbal guarantees and warranties are invalid unless goods are returned with original purchase receipt. No purchase receipt available.)

* Half-grown trees
* Braai mielies
* Cellphone airtime
* Bad art (wood carvings and oil-on-canvas, mostly)
* A gas refill for your car air-conditioner, and windscreen repair
* Exhaust repair services and tyres
* Mosquito nets
* Prostitutes (rental only)
* Furniture (wicker, wood, cushions)
* Mirrors (framed and unframed)
* Cigarettes and sweets
* Fruit of every description
* Raw seafood (snoek being most popular)
* Rolled-up lawn (the real thing, not fake grass)
* Tree-felling services

The downside of a popular currency

June 25, 2009 By: Phillip Category: Money, Retail

South Africa’s currency, the Rand, is very liquid on international markets. Sometimes a little too much so for our tastes, to be honest. On occasion we have such vast fluctuations in the value of the Rand that we appoint expensive commissions of enquiry to listen to conspiracy theories involving bank malfeasance and profit-seeking traders. The truth, of course, is much simpler than that: your Western governments just want to keep the black man down.

Such technical reasons aside, all you really need to know is that the exchange rates against the Dollar, Pound, Euro or Yen can move by three or four percent in a single day. Under exceptional circumstances – such as when the black man requires a particularly good stomping – the rates have been known to move by more than ten percent in a week, in either direction.

Approximate value: €9.98 to €63.95, depending on the prevailing exchange rate.

Approximate value: €9.98 to €63.95, depending on the prevailing exchange rate.

So, basically, your money may suddenly be worth more, or less, than when you left home with, and unless you are watching the exchange rate you won’t even know it until you reach the front of the foreign exchange queue.

If you can’t afford that kind of risk, pin down the exchange rate before you leave. Depending on your bank there are a couple of ways to do this: rand-denominated travellers cheques (or travellers checks as you bloody Americans insist on misspelling it), pre-paid debit cards that pretend to be credit cards (also denominated in rands), or a foreign-currency account with your bank.

Most of us locals don’t take those kind of precautions when we visit abroad, because the risk isn’t really all that big unless you plan to spend hundreds of thousands of rands. A couple of percentage points either way just doesn’t impact on small sums, and one fewer beer from the hotel mini bar isn’t going to kill you. But don’t say we didn’t warn you.

For excellent, free and real-time currency conversion, check out xe.com

Howzzzt: now with a comment system we don’t entirely understand

June 22, 2009 By: Phillip Category: Howzzzt

As part of our ongoing exploration of technologies we don’t understand and probably shouldn’t be messing with, Howzzzt now employs the services of Disqus to handle comments on the site. This has a couple of advantages obvious even to us luddites, including the fact that you can now use your Facebook or Twitter identity to talk back. Or something like that.

It probably also has a number of drawbacks which, being effectively cavemen playing with computers, we haven’t spotted yet. If you find the comment system broken, please drop us a line via our contact page.

To be fair, our Twitter account has not yet brought about the Apocalypse, but we remain convinced that all this Web 2.0 stuff is, somehow, up to no good. That may be exactly why we can’t resist tinkering with it.

Cigarettes and violent femmes

June 15, 2009 By: Phillip Category: Illicit & illegal, The natives

If you are French, or hail from a similar mainland European country, you’d better watch yourself. Mothers of young children and pregnant women will viciously assault you with handbags, or at the very least glare at you fiercely and mutter among themselves, if you light up a cigarette in any public space. Yes, it’s just like California. And everywhere else in the civilised world. Europe is the last outpost of the indoor smoker.

One quick way to piss off the natives

One quick way to piss off the natives. Image by AMagill with some rights reserved.


Smoking is illegal in just about any public space in South Africa, except in rooms specially designated and equipped. That includes public transport and hotel lobbies. As a rule you can light up anywhere with bar (as in the actual counter over which alcohol is served), but if you are a first-time visitor then don’t risk even that. If there is a roof but no ashtrays, and no other smokers, then just don’t do it. Even if you don’t get fined – which you won’t – you’ll soon discover just how much support the ban has. Even if you’re outside in the cold and the rain, don’t think you’re safe. Blow your exhaust in the general direction of a non-smoker and see for yourself.

However, procuring cigarettes won’t be a problem. Almost all advertising is banned but all the major brands – Marlboro, Camel, Dunhill, Stuyvesant, Gauloises, and the usual cheap stuff – are available at all the 24-hour garage shops and from vending machines or over the counter at just about any drinking establishment.

If you are a cigar smoker then you may have more trouble finding your favourite brands. The stuff you can buy in general retailers and at bars is usually cheap ‘n nasty (except for the upper-class steakhouses and the like); though there are still specialist tobacconists to be found in the big cities.

Just keep in mind that sin taxes are high, so if you are coming to South Africa for a short stay, bring in a carton of duty-free.


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