Sports team names: we’re not trying to confuse you on purpose, promise
We’re just fairly creative, is all. But if you are an outsider looking in, it admittedly could look like we’re intentionally trying to make it hard for you to follow the conversation in a bar the Friday before a big sporting weekend.
Each of our national squads has at least one nickname with no apparent connection to the official name, at least no connection that English speakers (or French, or Spanish, or Portuguese, or anybody other than maybe Swahili speakers) could be expected to grasp. That single, common nickname is by no means the only one. This is a country with more official languages than you can shake a stick at, and several regional dialects for each of those. If you want a correct and exhaustive list of all the alternatives then you’re going to need a lot of determination and a fast car. New names are popping up constantly and fading into and out of vogue unpredictably.
In general, though, this thoroughly useful and utterly accurate (correct only at the instant of publication, no liability implied or accepted, caveat lector) guide should get you through.
Bafana Bafana: The national soccer squad. The name literally translates at “The Boys”, which once upon a time caused a minor stir because of the Apartheid-era insult of calling every black man, regardless of age, a boy. Like we told a former President when he brought that up: screw you if you can’t tell a term of endearment apart from an insult. We have a fierce sense of ownership towards these boys, and only a nincompoop wouldn’t be able to see that.
No, it's not a name that makes you think of pain and domination. But tell that to the English bloke with blood gushing out of his head. Image by Fabien Dany with some rights reserved.
Proteas: The national cricket team, and one of the very few that doesn’t have a cute nickname. The Protea is our national flower which, though reasonably pretty, has no athletic, acrobatic or war-like connotations whatsoever. It’s not even very poisonous. The name is the result of a post-Apartheid compromise that will hopefully be rethought some day soon. We recommend “The Howzzzts”, which you have to admit would be pretty damn cool.
Banyana Banyana: Sounds familiar, right? Translates as “The Girls” and, as you’d expect, refers to the national women’s soccer team. We don’t take women’s soccer particularly seriously around here, much like the rest of the world, but when Banyana plays an import game we’re all suddenly supporters.
amaKrokoKroko: The Paralympic team. This one was also controversial at one point, for all the wrong reasons. It derives from “crock”, that very British word for an old and feeble person. However, the team originally adopted this as their own nickname and proceeded to infuse it with a lot of irony by performing better than some of our supposedly able-bodied athletes. Nobody except the most far-out politically correct types will be offended if you use it.
amaGlug-Glug: The national under-23 soccer side. The name comes from what was once a phenomenally successful TV ad for chemicals company Sasol, which at the time sponsored the team. It’s either very cute or hugely insulting when you consider that, in the ad, the phrase “glug-glug” was uttered by a baby.
