Titles you may acquire while visiting South Africa
We’re not a particularly formal bunch of people here in South Africa, and our multitude of languages and cultures don’t make for strict rules of address anyway. On occasion this causes some distress for a certain class of visitor. Take our advice: if you are old-fashioned enough to be affronted by being called anything other than “sir” or “madam”, then don’t come. And if you absolutely have to visit, say for business, then stick to chauffeur-driven cars, five star hotels and restaurants with French-sounding names. Just don’t set foot on the street.
If you are black and could pass for a local, then be prepared to be addressed in a dizzyingly large number of ways, all of which will be incomprehensible to you. Sadly there is no visual cue, no mode of dress or body language, that will set you apart as a foreigner. Just announce yourself as such at your earliest opportunity, crank up your accent a notch for good measure, and your interlocutor will switch over to passable English forthwith.
If you are caucasian, Asian or anything other than a milk-chocolate shade of brown, then you are really in for it. Depending on your sex, age and the ironic intentions of the person addressing you, you may be called any of the following: baas, bra, brother, boss, chief, dame (more often the Afrikaans version than the English), friend, hey you, lady, madam, mamma, man (in either English or Afrikaans in equal portions), meneer, mevrou, sis, sissy, sista and sister. Plus a couple of less common, regional variations.
None of these are necessarily an insult, compliment, a term of endearment or an offer of casual sex. What you are called usually has nothing at all to do with you, your appearance or your relationship with the caller. Don’t take it personally, in other words.
Note that it is considered a sign of ill breeding to respond with the same honorific with which you are addressed. Our suggestion is that you pick out one of the above (or two, if you wish to go gender-specific), try it out on a couple of people and, if it goes down well, stick with it. Do not, under any circumstances, accept from a stranger an offer to be taught a couple of friendly local words. You’ll go around innocently sprouting the most hideous insults imaginable for the rest of your trip. Our sense of humour is weird that way.
